door. slightly ajar. caught in the draught of a new breeze...
I can feel the doors of Canada starting to close.
It's time for me to leave this life-changing place.
I know that new doors are opening already, but for now I find it difficult to have the grace to allow the ones behind me to close.
A new and exciting journey begins shortly, and I will muster my strength to move my heavy feet forward and let go of that which sets me free.
I love you and I will miss you more than you will ever know.
Waiting in Canada...
"
Write down the words of sadness, Burn them in a cup" - Jann Arden,
Waiting In Canada
It seems that a cup would not be enough to contain the sadness I feel today.
I had a vision last night of the earth from space, the white mist of spirits leaving the planet shielding my view. I woke up with tears in my eyes, the reality of the tragedy of the Tsunamis has hit home.
One of the guys who lives in the attached apartment to mine is missing in Thailand. We're all worried, as he was boasting about how he would be sunning it up on a Thai beach while we were stuck in the cold. It never occurred to me until today that he may be there. I called my room-mate, who is very close to him and has heard nothing. Together, with the others upstairs, we wait.
Into the Mondo Beyondo
My friend introduced me to an awesome blog the other day, which prompted us to create a
Mondo Beyondo list, like an uber-new-year's-resolution list.
Here is my list:
- to live in every continent of the world for at least one year;
- to learn to kayak properly and regularly do it;
- to buy a grand piano and develop extraordinary piano playing skills;
- to learn and become super excellent at making resin accessories;
- to become a travel journalist;
- to find an innovative way of helping those in need that inspires the everyday person to be involved;
- to find the "soulmate" who complements who I am and helps me to be everything I'm meant to be (uber-me!);
- to have a space where I can paint the walls purple with an orange feature wall;
- to find a new spiritual connection or have it find me;
- to complete a course in astral projection and astral travel;
- get a 2nd degree;
- learn to live in a more simplified way (de-need myself of things);
- finally become vegetarian;
- feel comfortable about my own body;
- swim in the Atlantic and Indian Oceans;
- see the earth from space;
- read 'War & Peace'; and
- make an effort to go an see more local musicians live (the small, budding ones!).
If I can complete any of these things I will be super proud of myself.
In a different world...
Everything in this world fills me with wonder.
Snow on a motor mower in a snow covered back yard. A picture of banal urban life with frosting.
I went for a walk with my friend last night. The snowflakes fell down around us, and we made fresh tracks in untouched snow on the ground. It was like one of those television moments where the young, single woman has just had a heart connection with a new beau, and walks home as the snowflakes fall around her...a moment that makes you smile and fills your heart with warmth.
It occurred to me afresh that travel is not so much about the place you go, or the money you pay in the tourist queue, or even the journey itself. It's about wonder in the everyday things, breathing in cold night air, taking a walk and observing everyday life in the suburbs of a city that is not your own. It's about making a heart connection with someone, being invited to participate in someone's life that is different from your own, spending time with other human beings.
When I return home, I want to take wonder in things that I never paid attention to before, about myself, my environment and the world in which I live. I want to make an effort to connect with others and help them see the wonder in their own lives.
There are no empty vessels here, just people who can not see, hear, taste, smell and touch the wonder of their lives.
It's Christmas Day in Australia now, and Christmas Eve here in Calgary.
It is unbelievably fantastic to reconnect with my friend. Instant happiness. Wrapped up in the warmth of the person that she is, hanging out in her room - a space that is all about her, and is a reflection of everything that I adore about her. Everything about this space and moment in time feels awesome!
I spent the morning just hanging out under the warm duvet, listening to music, writing and looking out the window at the snow covered everything. I shared a coffee with my friend's mom, an amazing and interesting woman. We talked of travel, anthropology, life in Calgary, science fiction, filling any tiny moments of awkward silence with banter about the weather.
I woke up several time in teh night and opened the blinds to check that the snow was still there. Even in the dark, everything is bright white and I wonder if this is what Christmas is all about...it certainly feels more like Christmas than anything I have experienced before.
Tonight, we are having a Ukranian Christmas Eve dinner. Cabbage rolls, perogies and I'm told, onions galore! I am too excited for words. YAY!
This week in Reen's World
I was driving behind a BMW 4WD and the letters on the number plate were TAC, I just wanted to add a 'K' and a 'Y' to the end of it.
I accidentally watched Extreme Makeovers last night. What one women needed, was Extreme Psychological Treatment. She didn't look that bad, had a job and a man that obviously loved and adored her. What more could she want? Apparently had lots of deep scaring from her mother not telling her she was beautiful. Yeah, sorry love, plastic surgery isn't what you needed.
Beer makes you say "Fuck that was nice. Think I'll have more."
The D-Gen Late Show is still funny 12 years later.
Sometimes when you think about people, they do text you. Could it be that they are thinking about you too?
As much as this year has been great, thank fuck it's almost Christmas. Bring it on.
Regrowth from a Brazilian is annoying because you can't scratch it in public.
Bush was Time magazine's man of the year. What the fuck's up with that? Were there no other candidates? Will he have them killed if they didn't name him?
Even though you can't hug and pat them, fish can still be fun.
a song that reflects my mood...
flawless light in a darkening air
alone...and shining there
love will not elude you
love is simple
i worship this tenacity
and the beautiful struggle we`re in
love will not elude us
love is simple
be sure to know that
all in love
is ours
and love, as a philosophy
is simple
i am calm in oblivion
calm, as i ever have been
love will not elude me
love is simple
be sure to know that
all in love
is ours...
is ours...
that all in love
is ours
and love, as philosophy
is simple...
and ours...
- lang & piltch
a collection of small quotes from everyday people...
Things that have been said to me this week...
"I am from Columbia. But I don't have any connections, so don't even ask me to get you any drugs." - first coffee date with new friend.
"Go out and get yourself tanked, even though it's Tuesday." - quiet, very private Scottish 60y.o. lady revealing a little glimmer of mischief.
"This is Arial, font size 11. Do you think it would be better if it were font size 10.5? I know that our standard is font size 11, but I think it will work better, as far as readability goes, if we make it 10.5." - my ever so anal and monotonous boss, possibly whom "Office Space" was based on.
"You can get a free meningococcal vaccination at the Pumpjack pub on Davie Street, cos you're gay, right? I saw it on the news." - someone who is trying very hard to connect with me. (Incidentally, I responded, "Jeez, it must have been a slow news day if my sexuality makes the headlines!")
A Rose by any other Name
Nicknames have always been part of my life. For as long as I can remember, my parents called me by a nickname. I often wondered why they bothered giving me a "proper" name at all.
In some cultures, nicknames are so entrenched that everyone has one. Usually due to a religious or superstitious reason. In some Australian Aboriginal cultures, nicknames are given to people who have the same name as someone who has died, as the names of the dead are forbidden to be spoken.
In western cultures, nicknames have a much less significant meaning. Many names have pet forms which are commonly used and over time have become names in their own right. Other nicknames may be given to people because of a particular physical characteristic. This is particularly evident in Australia, where redheads are called "bluey". Australian culture is also fond of taking one's surname an adding a "y" or "o" sound to the end.
Nicknames can identify you to your close circle of friends and family. They can tie people together, bring back memories, stir emotions.
They can also create a persona to perform with in public, allowing you to keep your private self private.
Nicknames may work for you your entire life, but sometimes sound less cool, less appealing when your death is written about all over the world.
R.I.P. Dimebag Darrell
MELBOURNE TAKES FIRST STEPS TOWARDS BECOMING DARWIN
In a shock move, the controversial "Darwin-Wannabe Bill" passed through Melbourne City Council yesterday in a close vote that saw the bill passed by only one vote.
The bill, effective immediately, would initiate steps to the city of Melbourne becoming a tropical destination.
"Everyone is always complaining about Melbourne being a cold, wet place," stated one City Councillor.
Premier Bracks, in a late news conference stated that the bill's passing was "A win for Melbourne, a win for tourism, a win those who enjoy wearing hawaiian shirts, and a win for Sydney...oh, actually, forget that last bit."
Citizens noticed immediate changes with the first implementation of changed weather patterns being set up by the Beaureau of Meterology.
"Many people don't realize how advanced our technology has become," said Beaureu spokesperson and former celebrity meteorologist, Rob Gell. "Sure, we had problems predicting the weather, but we decided a different approach, by deciding the weather instead. This bill heralds a coup for our department, as we get to really make a difference," Mr. Gell said.
"Darwin is always so fortunate being 32 degrees with afternoon storms every single day. Melbourne will now have that same level of predictability." said an excited Melbourne based weather enthusiast and storm chaser. "Although they will need to raise the temperature a little before we can truly be like Darwin."
Insurance companies welcomed the news with some caution. "This move means inevitably more revenues for us, however we are concerned that we do not have sufficient loopholes in our policies in order to minimize payouts to those suffering storm damage." said one large insurance company agent. "We are confident that we can revise these policies as soon as possible to ensure minimal convenience to our customers."
Farmer's lobby groups slammed the move, stating that once again the government had forgotten their rural counterparts. "It's too wet and dry for Victorian Farmers. But once again our complaints have fallen on deaf ears, down on Spring Street."
The Liberal government plans to appeal, asking that we return to the weather experienced in teh 1950's. Prime Minister John Howard is expected to weigh in to the debate, later today.
wisdom from the washroom...
Scrawled on the door of a Seattle diner washroom...
"
Making today awful, so that tomorrow seems better."
